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Tuesday, October 20, 2009

"You Should Just Make Being Home Really Miserable for Him..."

I got some classic passive aggressive advice from a friend today. We were chatting at our kids' morning bus stop and comparing notes about the ways in which our husbands get on our nerves (sorry, honey!) My complaint was about how my husband has had too much time on his hands recently, so he has this annoying little habit of looking over my shoulder whenever I am on the computer. Reading my e-mails, browsing my Facebook photos, even scanning my's not that he's checking up on me and not that I have anyting to hide; he's just passing time and I cringe when he does it!

So, my friends exact words were, "You should just make being home really miserable for him." She started to tell me that she had been thinking about some ideas for how to do so...but the bus came. For the sake of my marriage, I think I am glad not to be armed with ideas! But what do you think she would have said?

How many of you have expressed your frustration in your relationship through passive aggressive means? I'm sure a lot of your tales would be funny...I'll bet if the bus hadn't interrupted us, my neighbor would have had some hilariously conniving tips to rid me of my over-the-shoulder computer loiterer. Do tell what you have done!


  1. Oh my gosh! I totally understand what you mean! My boyfriend just got a job and he talks about it nonstop like he is the only one with customer problems. I too have a job that deals with customer service and I have had to deal with customers since high school. It frustrates me so much! Finally, one day when I felt like I couldn't take it anymore, I sat him down and told him how I felt. I told him that I was very glad he enjoyed his job and that I liked how he was so willing to share what he was going through, but all this talk about work was driving me crazy. He was shocked at first because he had no idea I felt this way, but started to talk less about work when he was around me! Assertiveness win!

  2. I have a hilarious PA revenge story about my sister and brother-in-law! She dutifully does all the laundry, yet her husband cannot seem to grasp the concept of turning his undershirts and socks right-side-out after disrobing, despite countless reminders. (He also lets them drop wherever they may fall around the house.) She was talking with a fellow "desperate housewife" who suggested the following: wash them inside-out, put them away inside-out (socks unmatched, as the colors/patterns are undetectable that way), and wait for the fun to begin. As my sister's husband was fumbling around in the dark trying to get dressed for a trial (he's a successful attorney), she could hear grumbling and swearing emanating from the dressing room as he struggled to make sense out of his clothes. When she informed him his clothes would be washed in the manner in which they made it to the laundry room from now on, he changed his tune. Problem solved!